Chapter 7.7 Obsession of the Reincarnated Childhood Friends
Obsession of the Reincarnated Childhood Friends:
“Yu Hui.”
“…”
“Yu Hui?”
“Ah, yes. Sorry, I was spacing out for a moment.”
After being called twice, I snapped out of my deep thought.
“Hmm… are you feeling foggy? Do you still know who I am? Say my full name once.”
Doctor He frowned slightly, placed the cigarette she was holding in her mouth onto the ashtray, and seriously inquired about my physical condition.
It must be because I suddenly zoned out that she thought I was having an episode again. I’ve worried people again, I’m just so…
I quickly put on a smile, projecting an energetic and spirited demeanor, and replied.
“I’m fine, my consciousness is very clear. You are Dr. He Mengyu from the psychiatry department, aren’t you? I’m truly sorry, I was thinking about other things just now.”
The doctor didn’t speak, just stared into my eyes for a while before picking up the cigarette from the ashtray again and holding it in her mouth.
The ashtray was clean because smoking is prohibited in the hospital, so Dr. He hadn’t lit the cigarette, merely holding it.
She always looked sleep-deprived, with deep dark circles under her eyes, and a cigarette in her mouth – these were Dr. He Mengyu’s three defining characteristics.
“Hmm… it seems you’re really fine now. Well then, starting from today, you finally don’t have to come see this old auntie of yours regularly.”
“It’s all thanks to you.”
Dr. He was quite insecure, often ridiculing herself as an old hag.
To me, she was clearly a beauty with an enviable figure. A little bit of grooming would surely attract male attention, and with her profession, she must have many people pursuing her. I really don’t understand why she’s so self-conscious.
“Ugh… I didn’t do anything much, and in the end, I couldn’t help you cure your illness.”
“No, if you hadn’t helped me control the timing of my episodes, I wouldn’t have been able to get through these past few years safely.”
“Mm… I could only help to this extent at most.”
“That’s already a monumental kindness, I will definitely repay you.”
“That’s not necessary… But Yu Hui, it’s really rare for you to space out like this. Do you have someone you like?”
Someone I like… perhaps?
“…Perhaps.”
“Is that so? Then, do your best. Finally, you can enjoy your youth properly.”
The doctor paused and continued.
“This is some experience from someone who’s been there… I had two chances presented to me in the past, but I didn’t seize them properly. So, if you really like someone, don’t overthink anything and just go for it. Otherwise, you’ll regret it too late…”
“Is that so… Doctor, you couldn’t be with the person you liked?”
“Mm… The person I liked has been married for over ten years… they have a child as old as you, and a happy, fulfilling family.”
“I see…”
I felt I could somewhat understand the doctor’s melancholic mood. The situation was somewhat similar… He already has a girlfriend…
Knock, knock, knock.
A knock on the door broke the silence. Dr. He distractedly called out, “Come in.”
A stern-looking middle-aged man pushed the door open and walked in.
“Director An, Director An! What are you doing here!”
Dr. He, who had just been lounging with her legs crossed, scrambled to her feet upon seeing the newcomer. The cigarette in her mouth fell to the floor, her eyes widened more than usual, and she even fussed with her clothes.
This was the first time I had seen Dr. He so flustered. I remembered when the hospital director came to see her last time, she didn’t even get up from her seat and maintained a casual attitude… Could this sharp-eyed male doctor be the object of Dr. He’s affection?
He looks a bit similar to him…
“Are there still patients? Then I’ll come back later…”
“Ah, it’s fine, the diagnosis is over. So, Dr. He, I’ll be going back now.”
“Mm? Ah, ah, then Yu Hui, be careful on your way. Call me anytime if anything happens.”
“Okay, I understand. Then I’ll take my leave.”
After nodding my goodbyes, I pushed the door open and left the room, leaving them to have their private time.
Even though the person she liked has been married with children for many years, Dr. He still can’t forget him… That’s right, it’s only normal to not be able to forget.
As I walked back to school, my mind was no longer sluggish. Although my dad looked worried and offered to drive me, I refused. I’m fine now, I can pay attention to traffic lights and passing cars, I can travel alone.
Lately, my thoughts have become increasingly clear.
I don’t feel inexplicably drowsy anymore.
I can remember many things.
I don’t suddenly fall asleep.
My daily routine is no different from that of a normal person.
My father and mother were moved to tears, saying my hypersomnia was finally cured.
They really went through a lot… Ever since I fell ill in middle school until now, they have centered their lives around taking care of me. My gratitude is beyond words.
When I first entered middle school, I suddenly came down with a strange illness.
I couldn’t stay awake.
I had to sleep.
I spent most of my day sleeping.
In the worst instances, I slept for five or six consecutive days.
Since falling asleep on the road while walking was very dangerous, I studied at home for a long time. Later, with Dr. He’s help, I could manage to stay awake for a period during the day and attend classes with my father driving me. Although I still spent most of my time sleeping in the infirmary.
I can say I spent my entire three years of middle school in a dream.
Then, after entering high school, my condition finally improved.
Dr. He could never figure out why I suddenly fell ill, persisted for three whole years, and then suddenly recovered. This made Dr. He, who was always determined to do her best, very invested in my case.
But I knew exactly what was going on. It was simply because the long ‘dream’ had finally ended.
Along with the onset of hypersomnia, came dreams that felt like lifetimes.
In different eras, I had different identities, experienced different things, and repeatedly met and parted with familiar people…
I began to lose track of who I was, my sense of self blurred, my memories became incredibly chaotic, and I couldn’t distinguish between dreams and reality.
Why did this have to happen to me?
When I occasionally woke up, I would always fall into a state of complaint.
It not only stole my time, leaving me with only a few things I could do, but it also made me feel lost and vague, as if I were barely living. Every day, I could only sleep, sleep, and keep sleeping… Wasn’t that just like a corpse?
Wouldn’t it be better to just die… Why was I dreaming about these things that had nothing to do with me?
I was confused, lost, and immensely irritated.
It was utterly foolish to be troubled by these unreal, false memories.
Until I met him again.
Like waking from a deep sleep, I suddenly understood.
I thought it was just a dream.
I thought it was just fantasy.
I thought it was just an illusion.
It was just a virtual scenario created by my brain while I was asleep.
But the moment I met him, the moment I saw him, I understood. Those were real. They were things I had experienced. They were my life, my memories accumulated through nine lifetimes of samsara.
When I saw him, those jumbled memories and agitated emotions all became orderly. ‘They’ stood behind me.
It seemed that just looking at him was enough.
It was an emotion engraved in my soul, overflowing.
I understood the meaning of my existence. Every reincarnation was for him alone, just to stay by his side, sometimes as a lover, sometimes as a daughter, sometimes as a wife, sometimes as a younger sister… No matter the identity, I just wanted to be by his side.
And in this life, I am just his childhood friend, who met him when I was young.
Those memories from each lifetime appeared in my mind in the form of dreams, and after I experienced the ninth ‘life,’ the memories abruptly stopped.
The long dream ended.
Tears streamed down my face uncontrollably.
The dream was over, and it was time to face reality.
Afterward, the memories of past lives grew fainter and fainter, truly like a dream, gradually being forgotten. Only the memories of him remained in my mind like a documentary.
I understood what that meant.
“Now it’s your turn.”
She, they, all of them said that to me.
It was as if they had completely entrusted me with something.
They passed on all their regrets, their unfulfilled wishes, their regrets, unreasonably onto me. It was heavy, yet I had to accept it.
In one life, you were a demon lord, your bloody hands conquering the central plains, yet you died for me.
In one life, you were a feudal lord, reigning over the world with immense power, yet you remained unwed for me.
In one life, you were a physician, with a benevolent heart and skillful hands, saving lives and healing the sick, yet you became crippled and ill because of me.
In one life, you were a Taoist, diligently cultivating to seek the heavenly path, yet you abandoned the Tao and returned to secular life for me.
In one life, you were a merchant, with immense wealth and glory, yet you squandered all your fortune for me.
In one life, you were a knight-errant, upholding justice and wandering the land, yet you retired to the mountains for me.
In one life, you were a general, with iron horses and spears, campaigning in the north and south, yet your tears scattered your army for me.
In one life, you were a scholar of great talent, destined for romance and dashing charm, yet you pulled back from the brink for me.
In one life, you were a scholar, achieving top honors and fame, yet you laid down your arms and returned to farming for me.
Nine lifetimes of samsara, I thought our fate was over, but I never expected to meet you again.
Samsara begins anew, this worldly connection, is finally unworthy of you.
You seem to have forgotten me, and there is already someone else by your side. Is it because the nine lifetimes of samsara have made you unwilling to meet me again and suffer?
In this life, I met you in the prime of my youth. It must be heaven’s way of telling me to repay your perseverance.
The one who came to my side is named An Juncheng.
“If you treat me with sincerity, will I not fail you…?”
Then I will treat you with sincerity, and trust that you will not fail me.
“Yes, please leave it to me… I will protect Lord Juncheng.”
He no longer obsesses over me, but it’s okay. He sacrificed so much for me, it’s time for me to give back.
“Protect you for a lifetime.”
This is the obsession that ‘we’ share.
An obsession that cannot be severed.
Yu Hui belongs to you in this life, Lord Juncheng…
