Chapter 8.2: Ji Lianbing’s Inner and Outer Self Interchange
[Jun Cheng Type Girlfriend]’s Deployment:
Upwards, continuing upwards… I can’t close my eyes. Don’t be afraid, this time it will definitely work.
I want to go… I want to hear his voice, I want him to gaze at me, I want to… touch him with my own hands.
Hello, hello.
I want… I really want to be held in your arms…
I push aside the terrifying things that are blocking me, and continuously rise from the abyss, reaching out my hands as far forward as possible, with the momentum of wanting to pluck the stars, even if it’s just one centimeter, I want to get closer.
It’s okay, I’ve tried many times. This time, I can definitely reach it.
In the endless darkness, a faint light can be seen.
Although it’s so weak it’s almost disappearing, it fills me with hope.
Fixing my gaze on that spot of light, I know that by constantly moving upwards, I can reach it.
And then, I finally arrived.
A dark gray ice layer, through which I can vaguely see the “outside.”
A horizontal line that divides this “place” into two: the boundary between consciousness and subconsciousness, the barrier of the mind, the dividing line of the spirit, the separation line of the soul. I am trapped in deep consciousness, unable to perceive anything from the outside. I can only desperately push upwards every time.
She has imprisoned me in deep consciousness, at the very beginning of my existence.
… Although she and I share memories and experiences, I still… I came near this ice layer, wanting to look at the outside world through it… I want to see him with my own eyes.
I also want to feel him more, and spend wonderful time with my Jun Cheng.
I reach out my hand, place my palm on the ice layer, close my eyes, and pour out this strong desire.
The surroundings begin to shake. Because of my strong longing, the ice layer that separates the inner and outer selves also begins to crack.
Even though she will push me back to the deepest part again, it’s all worth it as long as I can see Jun Cheng.
Jun Cheng said he would go on a date with me, hehe~
A date~ The last date was too rushed, I couldn’t enjoy it properly. This time, I must create wonderful memories.
The date venue…
I kind of want to go to an amusement park. I’ve wanted to ride a Ferris wheel for a long time, and lean on his shoulder.
An aquarium also sounds good, it seems very romantic.
… Where will he take me? I’m so excited, hahahaha~
But, Jun Cheng said the next date would be up to him.
If we end up going to a hotel…
“Stop your utterly foolish thoughts. This body does not belong to you alone.”
A cold voice penetrated the ice layer and reached my ears.
A person who looked exactly like me, with a face like frost, stared at me.
Our eyes met. She is also me, or rather, I was originally a part of her.
“Ah, the other me… How did you get to this place?”
“Heheh, calling me that, it really fits your personality. A ‘partner’? Ah, I told you, we’re not that kind of relationship, are we?”
The other me called me “obo” then hugged my arm, frowned, showed a disgusted expression, and turned her head away.
What… ah, so that’s what it means.
After searching through memories, I understood this joke. Listening to the other me murmur softly, “I’m really crazy, to have the leisure to joke with her,” made me even happier. I smiled knowingly and said,
“Heheh, you’ve been joking more often lately too. It must be Jun Cheng’s credit again.”
“Heh, you’ve also been joking more often lately… And this kind of ‘self-deprecating’ joke is even more amazing.”
If it were the old her, she would absolutely not joke casually.
She would never say such things.
Thanks to Jun Cheng, she has become a bit more adaptable than before. Is the ice mountain starting to melt?
This sentence hit her weak spot, and she instantly laughed angrily, staring at me and began to mock me.
“Heheh, Ruansui. I think we should just call you ‘ice cream,’ shouldn’t we? After all, your head is also very white and sweet, hehehe~”
“Hehehe, Ruansui… I’ve already thought of what to say in response.”
Of course, I knew she would react this way, so I had already thought of my next move.
If I can gain happiness,
“Hmm? I was separated from you, wasn’t I? So if you call me silly, sweet, and naive, I accept it. What’s wrong with being silly, sweet, and naive? Heheh~”
Heheheh~ You’re stumped, Miss Lianbing.
I didn’t expect that I still had some mischievous parts left? Hehe.
“You’re hopeless.”
“Are you talking about me… or yourself? We…”
“Hmph!”
She didn’t answer me, just snorted and stomped hard on the ice. With a crack, the ice began to crack.
I exclaimed and quickly retreated. The next second, with a rumbling sound,
A large hole was shattered through the ice layer.
She actually broke through this ice wall herself…
I surfaced and looked at her blankly, and she was also staring at me.
Her slightly furrowed brow never relaxed. Every time she saw me, her expression was one of impatience. The “Young Miss’s” arrogance was openly directed at me.
I understand, she hates me.
And she hates me from the bottom of her heart.
It can also be called ‘self-negation.’ Because the part she doesn’t acknowledge became the foundation that constitutes me. And in order to eliminate me, she suppressed me deep within my consciousness. But now, she has actually broken the barrier and let me out.
“What are you still standing there for? Do you expect me to pull you up?”
“Huh? If you could pull me up, that would be even better—”
Hearing me say that, she showed an annoyed look, but still reached her hand towards the water surface.
I quickly went over and took her hand. What if she suddenly changed her mind?
She pulled me out with one strong pull and immediately let go of my hand. …I’m out. A strange feeling surged up. This is a connection with the body. I should be able to touch the light I’ve always longed for right now.
But I didn’t excitedly run out immediately. Instead, I looked at that retreating back.
She stood with her back to me, silent for a long time, and then said.
“Are you okay?”
Without needing an explanation, I knew what she meant.
In fact, we didn’t need to talk face to face like this. I clearly understood any thoughts she had, and similarly, she should have known my thoughts perfectly.
She turned around, her face had already returned to its signature smile. Unlike my smile, hers was more like a ‘mask,’ not a smile from the heart.
“I didn’t expect you to actually persist… Aren’t you afraid being alone in ‘this place’? you weren’t swallowed by the ‘abyss’, your willpower is much stronger than I imagined, hehehe~ Consider it a reward for you.”
“As long as there is love in the heart, one can persevere anywhere.”
“…Ah, what’s so good about that herbivore male?”
She’s speaking insincerely again. Although it looks natural on the surface, it’s all just circumventing with words. She is quite unreserved in some aspects.
“You know very well what’s good about Jun Cheng, don’t you? Heh, after all, you and I share the same memories and feelings~ Who is it that meticulously wipes the Magatama given by someone every day? You’re not answering? I’ll take that as a default, okay? Hehe, thank you for your kindness.”
“Let’s go, now I don’t have to listen to your nagging anymore. I’d prefer some peace and quiet.”
“Do you want to go in there?”
Go back to where I was before? No… she will definitely go deeper— “This place was originally more suitable for me… for you it’s torment, but for me, it’s enjoyment.”
No… it’s a place that shouldn’t exist. That’s the “pain” that she and I share, the other half of the world that we pretend not to see and deliberately forget. For the first time, I “overlooked” the abyss below the ice layer from “this side,” and gained a more direct understanding of how terrifying “that side” is.
In the gray, cold water, countless dead lie immersed. From the heavens to the very roots of the abyss, everywhere I look are ‘the dead,’ mostly skeletons, a few corpses. Among the corpses…
To the very roots of the endless abyss. When they approach the ice layer, they will try to hinder me. Because I was born from her and have been in this place since then, I know it best. It is the darkest, most filthy part of everything that Ji Lianbing possesses.
“It shouldn’t exist? Hehehe…”
She didn’t look back, but instead stepped into the water. Extending from the filthy water, it formed a platform beneath her feet. But her feet didn’t get wet.
“And yet, this is the part that constitutes my ‘essence’.”
From the gray water surface, a throne made of piled-up limbs rises, with bodies lifting it up one by one. She walked past as if strolling, and with every step, a hand rose to support her sole, as if willing to be her stepping stone. Unlike my “criminal” status there, she is the “Queen,” “the woman who dotes on the dead and is loved by the dead.”
She sat on the throne, placed her hands on the skulls on the armrests, crossed her legs, and said to me with a smile.
“Lately, I’ve also been a bit too naive… Influenced by your sweet-as-sugar thoughts, I’ve become strange.”
“Haven’t you become happier?”
“…Happiness?”
She didn’t refute me, perhaps because she herself was also confused.
“Never mind, since the control of the body is temporarily handed over to you, external matters are none of my concern. This way, I can return to my origin.”
She snapped her fingers, and the corpses began to sink the skeletal throne into the water. The skeletons below the water surface began to…
book.SFACGco
She still smiled confidently.
“I admit it!”
I stood up and shouted at her.
“Don’t you really care about Jun Cheng being stolen by others!”
“…All I want is his corpse. I don’t crave his… So it doesn’t matter to me who he gets involved with, as long as the corpse belongs to me in the end.”
“Heh, are you jealous?”
“…If I were really jealous, would those vixens still be alive?”
“Isn’t it because you couldn’t suppress your killing intent and escaped here to swap with me?”
As I suspected. She still cares about Jun Cheng, doesn’t she? Recently, there have been too many girls around Jun Cheng, so she, consumed by jealousy, could barely restrain herself from staining her hands red. But she was afraid that if she killed those girls, Jun Cheng would come to hate her, despise her, so she fled here.
“Fine, leave it to me then!”
“Heh heh, let’s see how I use my charm as a woman to win Jun Cheng back~”
“Heh heh… Then I’ll wait and see…”
I will make Jun Cheng completely fall in love with me!
[Necroph]’s Tranquility:
Downwards, continuing downwards… Close my eyes, let my body drift naturally.
Hollow eye sockets gazed at me. I want… to touch him with my hands.
I want to obtain… I want to obtain his corpse. I want him to use his hollow…
…of bones.
I really want… I really want to hold the deceased him in my arms…
The skeletal throne crumbled, and I lay flat, sinking into the abyss.
I, I am still Ji Lianbing. What I’m fixated on has never changed.
“Go ahead and indulge in the remnants of peace…”
A quiet heart is the life of the flesh.
“Perhaps in the end, you will become a more terrifying existence than I am.”
And jealousy is the decay within the bone.
