Chapter 58: I Seem to Have Set a Flag
“Now is not the time to be saying this…”
Whether it’s a nightmare or a sweet dream, escaping requires a price. The price I paid in the spiral nightmare was my emotions. This time, I’m paying with my heart, which is the so-called ‘toll.’
Moreover, the situation this time is different from the nightmare Nana specially created for me. This time, I willingly gave my heart to Ruanruan. This is a promise to her, and also a form of compensation for me…
But Lan still couldn’t accept just ignoring it. She grabbed my collar and questioned me.
“No! Tell me clearly! What exactly is going on?! Without emotions and heart?! Wouldn’t that make you like a robot?!”
“Ah, calm down, Lan…”
“How can I calm down?! If, if Juncheng, you really lost your emotions and heart, then what’s the point of everything we’ve done…?”
Lan’s expression turned sad. The hand gripping my collar weakly released its grip, and she rested her forehead against my chest, her voice barely audible. This was followed by soft sobs as she started to cry.
I knew why Lan had become so agitated and what she was afraid of.
But if I had to say, I myself was the most afraid of becoming that way.
“Don’t worry, Lan. I won’t become heartless. Giving up my emotions and heart refers to ‘personal affection’ and ‘selfishness.’ How should I put it? It’s like discarding ‘what I like the most’ and ‘what I want the most,’ something along those lines…”
However, the last time I gave up my emotions, my mind was indeed consumed by a monster called ‘reason’….
Fortunately, Ruanruan and others healed me afterwards, allowing me to slowly find back those missing emotions.
Lan still seemed to not fully understand, but she had stopped crying. She looked up at me with teary eyes, asking for further explanation.
But honestly, I don’t understand it very well either. I just roughly know what I’ve given up.
“Everyone has desires, and the root of desire is ‘for oneself,’ which is so-called ‘selfishness.’ It can be said to be the foundation of being human. ‘Personal affection’ is the same. Human emotions and desires are diverse, but there will always be things that are most wanted and most liked. And this guy has discarded that part.”
…Does that mean Juncheng no longer has the person he likes the most or the thing he wants the most? Is that what it means?
“Yes, didn’t Juncheng An reject you once before?”
Lan felt as if her heart had been stabbed. She felt like she was going to throw up blood.
This dark history was always brought up in various situations. For Lan, it was like being repeatedly hit with a knife… Wait, it seems like the one who created this old wound was… her.
“At that time, Juncheng An hadn’t yet discarded his emotions, which is why he rejected you. Because he thought having one girlfriend he liked the most was enough.”
“That’s right. The reason he accepted you all later, besides your own efforts, was largely because Juncheng An had already discarded his emotions and no longer had a ‘most favorite person.’ Since he liked everyone equally, there was no problem accepting them all.”
“…I see, so that’s why that stubborn Juncheng suddenly became enlightened and smoothly decided to form a harem according to my plan…”
Lan showed a look of sudden realization, wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes, and revealed a relieved smile.
“I thought at the time that Juncheng had finally succumbed to his beastly nature surrounded by so many beautiful girls and taken the first step as a scum scoundrel… Alright! Juncheng, your scum value has decreased significantly!”
Is this something to be happy about?!
Are you two teaming up to blacken my reputation?!
“It’s not entirely because of that… As a man, I have to take responsibility…”
“Mhm! Juncheng like this is the most handsome!”
“Please don’t be like that… Lan.”
I’m already used to Lan suddenly hugging me and rubbing against me, but I’m still not used to such flattering praise.
Nong Yu looked at us, sighed deeply, and showed a wry smile, saying, “This is a very dangerous situation, Juncheng An. Please be more mindful.”
“I don’t feel like there’s any major problem. I can still think calmly most of the time, so it’s not too bad…”
“Indeed, being able to voluntarily choose which part of ’emotion’ and ‘heart’ to discard is quite a rare situation. It requires considerable spiritual power and a magnificent soul. However, since Juncheng An is the reincarnation of my husband, being able to achieve this level is of course…”
“I know you’re about to start with ‘but’!”
But! Huh?”
I knew it. There had to be a turn of events.
“Don’t try to play mind games to interrupt me in this situation! You idiot!”
Beat down…
SF Novel
Even Nong Yu, who appears to be a lady from a distinguished family, flew into a rage and hit me. Perhaps I really went too far…
“Didn’t I just say it? The ‘Four Discardals’ are almost complete, and you are in imminent danger.”
“You keep talking about the ‘Four Discardals,’ but what exactly are the ‘Four Discardals’…”
“The ‘Four Discardals’ are also a kind of destiny, like the ‘Four Calamities’ centered around you. Do you understand now?”
“Ah, like the Four Calamities?”
Thinking of the Four Calamities, my stomach cramped. Because basically, the most unfortunate things always unfolded around the awakening of the Four Calamities.
That makes sense. Since they are called ‘calamities,’ how could anything good happen… But what does it mean to be centered around me?
Aren’t the Four Calamities referring to Lianbing, Xue Qing, Xuan’er, and Li Nai? What does it have to do with me?
“The Four Calamities are a great destiny. No single person can bear it, so there is a distinction between the primary and secondary. The primary is the Master of Destiny, and the secondary is the Fated Witch.”
“Hmm? Does that mean I am the Master of Destiny?”
“Of course, it’s you. It must be you.”
“Gasp? Why do you say that?”
“Because I was a Fated Witch in my previous life, and Juncheng An, you, have been the Master of Destiny in every life.”
“Eh, eh, eh?!”
Am I this unlucky in every life?!
This miserable life is actually something that has been passed down to me from past lives!
“However, destinies can be good or bad. In this life, you are not only the host of the ‘Four Calamities’ but have also almost completed the ‘Four Discardals.’ You are truly unlucky…”
“This makes me so angry!”
Why does it have to be me?
Although I’m receiving special attention like a protagonist, I don’t want this kind of attention!
As a protagonist, shouldn’t I bear a better destiny? Why do I have to be the Four Calamities!
“Bearing destiny is something ordinary people would pray for. I don’t know why you’re so angry.”
“It’s a calamity, yet you say people would pray for it.”
“Of course. No matter what kind of destiny it is, as long as you can bear it, you can use Destiny Power. Destiny Power is the ‘power to change everything.’ It is the power to overturn providence, a power that transcends gods and laws, a power that everyone yearns for.”
“That sounds exaggerated…”
Yu Hui, no, Nong Yu raised her chin proudly and said.
“Do you think this world was created by a single god?”
“Huh? Isn’t it?”
“Although gods are powerful, they don’t have such incredible abilities. If it were just a space with no living beings, a god could naturally create it. But a world like this, almost indistinguishable from the real world, even capable of allowing copied spiritual bodies to think independently, is not something a mere god can do?”
“Then, could it be…”
“That’s right. This space was created by gods, but I created this world.”
So when Nong Yu first saw me, she said this place had a connection to her. Now it seems more than just a connection… This world was created by her!
Can Destiny Power really achieve this?
No, it’s only natural that it can achieve this level. After all, even I can rewrite reality by ‘speaking’ and bring Xue Qing back to life.
“After creating this ‘illusory moon and flowers,’ I exhausted my Destiny Power, used up my lifespan, and died…”
“Using Destiny Power consumes lifespan?”
“Yes, if used in large quantities, it shortens lifespan.”
No wonder I always felt something was missing from my body when using the ‘Calamity from the Mouth’ ability. It was my lifespan…
“Juncheng, did you…?”
“It’s alright, I haven’t used it many times, so my lifespan probably hasn’t shortened much…”
“Don’t push yourself anymore…”
“Mhm, don’t worry, I don’t want to die young either.”
That’s what I said, but if it really comes down to it, I’ll still have to use this trump card…
Anyway, I’m already dead, so what does lifespan matter. To hell with it.
“We’ve gone off track, where were we?”
“I have another destiny.”
“Yes, you have another small destiny called the ‘Four Discardals,’ which are ‘Discarding the Body,’ ‘Discarding Emotion,’ ‘Discarding the Heart,’ and ‘Discarding Nature.'”
“What does ‘Discarding Nature’ refer to?”
“Nature refers to one’s personality, which is one’s psychology and spirit.”
“Then I definitely won’t discard it.”
If I lose this, am I still me?
“Besides, haven’t you only completed two? It should be fine.”
“Have you forgotten that you’re already dead? Discarding the Body was completed the moment you died.”
“…Right, I’ve already kicked the bucket.”
“The destiny of the ‘Four Discardals’ is not that rare. After all, a dead person abandons their body and becomes a ghost. Discarding nature is formless, and eventually, one becomes a formless ghost, and formless ghosts are everywhere.”
“Formless ghosts? Could it be that the ghosts we talk about that can’t be seen are actually…”
“Yes, they are formless ghosts. Then, depending on residual emotions and obsessions, some become vengeful spirits, some become malevolent spirits, some become…”
“Alright, alright, I know how dangerous I am now… But if I complete all four, with no obsessions and no emotions, what will I become?”
Formless ghosts only involve discarding the body and nature. But I’m about to complete all four!
“I don’t know.” “Ah.”
“I haven’t seen a case where all four are completed either. However, the ‘Four Discardals’ are not considered a good destiny in smaller destinies, and I have a bad feeling about it, so I hope you’ll pay attention to it yourself.”
“Don’t worry, this last discard will absolutely not be completed.”
As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. I felt like I had set a serious flag…
It should be alright, right?
“I hope so…”
