66. Drunkard
Finally got the bowl washed.
Su Yan was patting his back, feeling miserable, thinking to himself that how could a favored child of the esports world endure such grievances.
Just wait, Jiang Zhi!
He wanted to find Jiang Zhi in the kitchen to settle the score, but before he could take two steps, he heard Qian Qian’s baby-like voice calling for help from the living room.
“Daddy, save me!!!”
The little one’s voice was sweet and urgent, as if she was trapped by something “terrifying.”
Su Yan paused, confused, and walked out of the kitchen.
As soon as he entered the living room, he saw two figures, large and small, entangled on the sofa.
No.
To be precise, it seemed to be a one-sided kidnapping.
Jiang Zhi was smiling as she locked Qian Qian in her arms, her long black hair falling down and making the little girl both anxious and ticklish.
Her long, fair legs were crossed, keeping the little one from moving, and her rosy lips occasionally puffed up, giving Qian Qian playful kisses on her soft cheeks.
“Daughter, let Mommy kiss you quickly. Mommy loves Qian Qian so much~”
Su Yan: ???
Do these two play like this at home every day?
Qian Qian shot him a pitiful and wronged look: “Daddy, save me! Mommy has gone crazy!”
Alright, it seems he was overthinking.
“Hey, Jiang Zhi.”
Su Yan walked to the edge of the sofa and called out tentatively.
Jiang Zhi said nothing, continuing to shower kisses.
Su Yan hesitated for a moment, then leaned in a step closer, cautiously poking her shoulder with his finger.
“Jiang Zhi?”
Still no response; she kept kissing.
Now Su Yan finally realized something was off.
He took a big step forward, leaning down to carefully examine Jiang Zhi’s face.
Thinking that this distance was inappropriate, he silently stepped back half a pace.
He saw her exquisite face flushed with an unnatural red, her eyes hazy, and a silly grin on her lips.
There was a slight scent of alcohol in the air.
Seeing this scene, Su Yan couldn’t help but inhale sharply; his eyelids started to twitch uncontrollably.
Could it be that she’s drunk?
Ah???
No way, how could she get like this after just a few dishes?
Half a bottle of beer?!
This was Su Yan’s first time seeing someone this intoxicated in reality; he didn’t know what to say besides “impressive.”
So she wasn’t unwilling to help; she was simply drunk.
“Daddy, save Qian Qian!”
The little girl was nearly crying, feeling overwhelmed by her mother’s love—Qian Qian didn’t want it anymore, sob sob sob 😣😣😣.
Su Yan’s eyes carried a hint of teasing:
“To be cautious, let me ask you one more time, oh daughter, you’re sure Mommy isn’t playing with you, right?”
“Daddy!”
“Okay, okay, I won’t tease you anymore.” In front of his daughter, Su Yan restrained his mischievous side a little.
Then he took out his phone to start recording.
This was a rare opportunity!
This was Jiang Zhi’s precious black history, and Su Yan couldn’t wait to see her reaction when she realized what she looked like when drunk.
Su Ziqian yelled at the top of her lungs: “Daddy!!!”
“Hey, hey, I’m coming!”
Su Yan put away his phone and effortlessly rescued Qian Qian from Jiang Zhi’s arms.
In short, it was the little girl’s lack of strength to blame.
At that moment, Qian Qian’s half face was covered in Jiang Zhi’s saliva; she wrinkled her small face as she wiped her cheeks, expressing her dissatisfaction with soft whines.
Su Yan found it both amusing and exasperating.
He turned to look at Jiang Zhi on the sofa, flailing her legs like a child, and felt a long-lost headache.
So now the question arose.
How to deal with her?
He had dealt with drunkards before, but they were all big men; this was a woman… and he had never even drunk with a woman.
Oh, wait.
He had drunk with his mother.
Anyway, he had to get Jiang Zhi to the bed first.
Sleeping on the sofa after getting drunk wasn’t pleasant; waking up with a headache and a sore back and neck was no fun, and falling onto the floor would be even worse. He had previously hurt his knee that way.
Su Yan felt Jiang Zhi didn’t deserve this.
She was just a foolish woman who didn’t recognize her own limits and often kicked him and scolded him, so she didn’t need to suffer like this.
Although most of the time, he was the one being cheeky first.
So the question arose again.
Su Yan approached Jiang Zhi, gradually leaning down, one hand wrapping around her neck and the other around her thigh.
“Slap!”
Jiang Zhi wrinkled her nose: “What do you want to do?”
“?”
Su Yan covered his face, looking at Jiang Zhi in disbelief; at that moment, she was raising her chin defiantly, glaring back at him.
Not drunk?
“What are you looking at?!”
Jiang Zhi waved her tiny fist threateningly: “I warn you not to touch me! I dislike gays the most, you know?!”
Not… drunk?
Su Yan examined Jiang Zhi suspiciously, wondering if she was pretending to be drunk to mess with him.
Could anyone be this bored?
Besides, what reason did Jiang Zhi have to do this? She wasn’t a three-year-old child… wait, was she really this childish?
Su Yan realized he didn’t know Jiang Zhi well at all.
Then he saw Jiang Zhi suddenly reach for her lower half, frowning and saying, “Strange, where’s my **?”
…Drunk.
Definitely drunk.
Too drunk, bro.
For crying out loud, you could still be considered a beautiful girl, don’t pull this kind of thing with a face that fits my preferences, you idiot!
Qian Qian was still here!
Su Yan couldn’t take it anymore.
Explosion!
He directly picked up Jiang Zhi in a princess carry and, just like weighing pork at the market, weighed her.
Not bad, not heavy.
After thinking it over, he felt this position was too ambiguous; if Jiang Zhi remembered it the next day, she would probably make trouble for him, so Su Yan simply pivoted and hoisted Jiang Zhi onto his shoulder.
Mainly to avoid ambiguity.
Qian Qian stared in astonishment from the side: 😦.
“Let me go, let me go!”
“…”
Su Yan carried the struggling Jiang Zhi into her bedroom, turned on the light, and glanced around the surroundings, his eyes half-open, mainly worried about seeing something he shouldn’t.
Even the style of Jiang Zhi’s bedroom was different from that of an average girl; at first glance, it looked like a boy’s room.
Except for the pink sheets and blankets on the bed—evidently Qian Qian’s things.
He couldn’t help but sigh again; was this really a woman?
He didn’t see anything shocking and let out a slight sigh of disappointment. He actually fantasized about finding some common scenario from romance novels.
Unfortunately, the most eye-catching thing in the entire bedroom was the computer on the corner desk.
As a professional, Su Yan could instantly tell that this computer’s configuration wasn’t that great.
But he could also see that Jiang Zhi played games, possibly competitive ones.
Could it be that she really plays *Dota*?
Just as Su Yan wanted to take a closer look, he suddenly felt pain in his shoulder; it was as if a puppy had bitten him.
“…What are you doing?” Su Yan helplessly said to Jiang Zhi.
Jiang Zhi bared her teeth, wriggling like a kitten being held by its scruff, kicking her legs wildly in the air.
“Let me go, let me go, I’m not gay!”
Halfway through, she suddenly turned theatrical, pinching her throat and fake-crying, “Wuwuwu, don’t *I have a big brother, I have someone I like…*”
Su Yan’s expression darkened instantly; he glanced nervously at Qian Qian, who was happily gnawing on her fingers behind him:
“Can you clean up your mouth a bit?!”
“Help me, help! Someone wants to rob a civil man, save me, wuwuwu…!!!”
Su Yan could no longer listen and directly covered Jiang Zhi’s mouth.
The next moment, however, he felt something warm and slippery touch his palm; this person really licked him like a dog.
☹️😩🤮.
He had only heard that the droppings of beautiful girls were fragrant, but were the saliva of beautiful girls also fragrant?
Su Yan struggled against his nausea as he tossed her onto the bed.
Jiang Zhi winced in pain, clutching her waist and emitting sounds of discomfort; when she tried to get up, Su Yan pressed her back down.
He said sternly, “Sleep, understand?”
Qian Qian also leaned on the bed, shaking her little head and mimicking Su Yan’s tone, “Sleep, or Daddy will spank Mommy’s bottom!”
Su Yan:…
“Hey? Isn’t that wrong?”
Qian Qian innocently asked: “I often see Daddy spank Mommy’s bottom, it’s just for sleeping…”
“Alright, alright, stop talking!”
At this moment, Su Yan also felt the kind of helplessness and resistance towards the future that Jiang Zhi had expressed.
Fortunately, Jiang Zhi was behaving well this time.
Moonlight streaming through the sheer curtains cast speckled light on her flushed cheeks. She obediently lay on the bed, her watery peach blossom eyes staring intently at Su Yan, suddenly beckoning him:
“Come here.”
“Uh?”
Su Yan was puzzled but didn’t think much of it, leaning closer to Jiang Zhi: “What is it… oh my god!”
“Mommy loves Qian Qian the most~”
Jiang Zhi suddenly wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing his face into her soft chest, rubbing against him like she was playing with a doll:
“Quick, let Mommy rua rua!”
“?” Su Yan was bewildered.
What the hell, face wash!
Jiang Zhi also wrapped her legs around Su Yan’s waist: “Don’t leave, Mommy wants to always be with Qian Qian.”
“??” Su Yan was even more confused.
What kind of yandere speech is this?
So you’re this type of person?
But now wasn’t the time to delve into that; Su Yan exerted much effort to pull his head out from her chest.
This kind of face wash wasn’t the sort he wanted!
He was thinking of continuing to push Jiang Zhi’s legs away, but the next moment, one of his arms was tightly held by Jiang Zhi.
Now his arm was wedged between her chest.
The two of them were intertwined on the bed like snakes; Jiang Zhi rested her head on Su Yan’s shoulder, her warm breath mixed with the scent of alcohol washed over his face, making his throat involuntarily tighten.
He tried to pull his arm away.
No movement.
He tried pulling again.
Still no movement.
Wasn’t your strength greater than this? So you were just pretending in the living room, right?
Su Yan realized the seriousness of the situation.
Oh wow, hahahaha… Su Yan was going crazy; this was way too much like a romantic comedy, was there anything even more romantic than this?
This was supposed to be a scene many boys would envy, but at this moment, he just wanted to leave and attend that damn celebration banquet.
Miss you guys, brothers.
I was wrong; I truly was wrong. I shouldn’t have abandoned you all to come here for a meal, and now I’ve lost someone in the process.
Fortunes turn; he cast a pleading glance at Qian Qian.
But instead, he saw Qian Qian tiptoeing toward the door, not forgetting to close it behind her and leaving the space to him and Jiang Zhi.
The little girl had a strong sense of being a caring little cotton-padded jacket.
Mommy had said, usually in these situations, Daddy and Mommy were making a little brother for Qian Qian, and she didn’t want to disturb them!
She had long wanted a little brother!
Thank me, Daddy!
Su Yan’s heart sank to despair: 😐.
