“What do you truly want from me?”
Jiang Huai was familiar with the marketing tactics of Purple Cloud Pavilion.
Purple Cloud Pavilion had been around for many years, existing in this world for hundreds of years. Many of the dresses they sold were designs he remembered from his past life, implying that Purple Cloud Pavilion likely had a transmigrator like himself. Jiang Huai had some knowledge of these marketing strategies. Sending dresses to Chu Xianning was not only a gesture of goodwill but also because Chu Xianning was well-known. If she were to wear Purple Cloud Pavilion’s dresses, many female cultivators would likely follow suit.
Jiang Huai recalled that Purple Cloud Pavilion had previously sent someone to inquire about Chu Xianning’s opinion. If Chu Xianning had agreed, Purple Cloud Pavilion would have sent her new designs for every season. However, Chu Xianning, who disliked accepting gifts from others, had always refused them coldly.
Now, seeing Chu Xianning in this qipao, she looked surprisingly good.
Jiang Huai glanced at her, then quickly averted his gaze. He felt that Chu Xianning’s eyes today were not as cool and aloof as usual, which made him feel unaccustomed in a way he couldn’t quite explain.
What should he be doing at this time usually? He should be wagging his tail at Chu Xianning, saying how nice the weather was, how beautiful his master looked, and asking if they should go for a stroll in the sect. He had already thought of these words, but he swallowed them back.
“No, Jiang Huai, you can’t.”
“You’re not a love expert. No matter how hard you try, you can only slightly stir Chu Xianning’s heartstrings. You expect too much, and the disappointment from dashed expectations will lead to a vicious cycle.”
“But if you were a true love expert, with so many despicable means to make people fall for you, would you still love Chu Xianning if you used those despicable methods on her?”
Two voices in Jiang Huai’s head began to argue incessantly.
“What are you guilty about?”
Jiang Huai suddenly realized this and, after a moment, let go of his worries. He looked at Chu Xianning’s face and said softly, “The fog has cleared. Master, do you want to go for a walk?”
“Where to?”
“The flying waterfall at Lingyuan Mountain is at its peak. Do you want to go see it together?”
“Okay.”
Surprisingly, Chu Xianning agreed so easily that Jiang Huai felt a sense of unreality.
“Then Master, please wait while I go bathe and change my clothes.”
Jiang Huai quickly went to the bathhouse. Soaking in the water, his mind cleared up a bit. Soon, he changed into a white robe and walked out. He went to Chu Xianning’s side, and together they left.
The summer sunlight was bright, falling on the qipao that enveloped Chu Xianning. Her waist was slender and delicate, too beautiful to hold. As he walked beside her, a faint floral fragrance would brush against him. It was uncommon to see the master and disciple walking together in the mountains, which drew the attention of passing disciples, yet none dared to look directly at Chu Xianning’s face.
The flying waterfall at Lingyuan Mountain was magnificent. Jiang Huai had seen it once before, sitting on a bluestone by the waterfall. The bluestone was cool and aloof. When Jiang Huai and Chu Xianning arrived, there was no one around. Chu Xianning stood quietly in front of the flying waterfall, gazing at the waterfall before her, her eyes becoming slightly profound.
Actually, there was nothing special about the waterfall.
It felt as if only the sound of the waterfall hitting the water remained in the world, so loud yet so quiet. Jiang Huai looked at Chu Xianning’s profile. The wind gently blew strands of her hair away from her ears. The hem of her qipao was also blown by the wind, revealing a small section of her smooth, snow-white calf.
Jiang Huai’s mind began to wander to inexplicable thoughts.
Where did his obsession with Chu Xianning come from? If, if Chu Xianning agreed to his liking and reciprocated his affection, what would Chu Xianning become? Would she be gentle as water, or would she remain as cold and aloof as usual? What were his desires for his master? Did he want her cold and pure body, or did he want to melt her cold heart?
Jiang Huai knew that many people in the Eastern Region admired his fairy master, Chu Xianning. What did they like about Chu Xianning? Did they like Chu Xianning’s beautiful face, or did they like her aloofness, like the moon, unattainable?
It seemed his liking was not particularly noble; it was merely that he wanted to see the ice mountain goddess smile only for him, as if that would bring him a sense of accomplishment. Thinking in a more despicable direction, Chu Xianning had raised him since he was young, being both a teacher and a mother to him. However, Chu Xianning didn’t know that a young boy’s body hid the soul of an adult. He would act spoiled towards her in a child’s guise, and she would always respond gently. He took advantage of everything… It seemed he was always the despicable one.
So, he always felt that Chu Xianning understood his despicable nature, yet when Chu Xianning said those words last night, she was very serious.
Jiang Huai suddenly felt that he didn’t really understand Chu Xianning.
“Master, why are you wearing white silk stockings today?” Jiang Huai didn’t know what else to say, but he felt it was too quiet, so he subconsciously uttered some nonsensical words.
“The woman from Purple Cloud Pavilion who gave me this qipao said it would look good with it. What do you think?”
Jiang Huai nodded vigorously. “It does look very good.”
Chu Xianning turned to look at him. “Where do you think it looks good?”
“It looks good everywhere. This qipao really suits Master’s figure.”
Chu Xianning walked to Jiang Huai’s side. The bluestone Jiang Huai was sitting on was large, and she lightly jumped onto it. Resting her hand on the bluestone, she looked towards the flying waterfall not far away. Jiang Huai heard her softly say, “I don’t have much of a figure, not like Luo Yueguan.”
Chu Xianning’s figure was slender, but not excessively so. When Jiang Huai was young, he always liked to hug Chu Xianning’s slender, snow-white thighs and rub against them. They were soft and fragrant. Her figure was indeed not as voluptuous and alluring as Luo Yueguan’s. When Luo Yueguan wore a qipao, even if it was tailored perfectly, there was always a hint of seductiveness.
“It’s different! Master’s slender body is more suitable for wearing palace dresses, making you look ethereal, like a fairy. No, Master is already a fairy.”
“But you just said it looked good.” Chu Xianning suddenly said.
Jiang Huai was taken aback. He turned to look into Chu Xianning’s eyes. Chu Xianning was just looking at him coolly. Jiang Huai quickly corrected himself. “This one looks good too. Anyway, Master looks good in anything. Even if she just wore a burlap sack, no one could compare.”
Chu Xianning’s gaze shifted back to the distant silver waterfall. She suddenly said softly, “I never cared… whether it looked good or not before.”
Jiang Huai was taken aback again.
“I was always alone before, disliked troubling myself with things, so I never got involved in troublesome matters, and simply cultivated in solitude. But since I brought you back to the courtyard, I seem to have changed a lot. Last night, I was looking through my old diary and suddenly realized that the me from before seemed somewhat unfamiliar.”
“Then does Master think… this change is good or bad?” Jiang Huai asked softly.
“I can’t say for sure.” Chu Xianning shook her head gently, but her eyes seemed to become a little lost. “People are strange. I just didn’t like trouble, and they called me the Iceberg Fairy Chu Xianning. The past me really disliked that title, but I didn’t know how to argue, so I gradually got used to it, and even I started to believe it.”
“Luo Yueguan always says she envies me for living a pure and simple life, understanding things clearly. But it’s not like that.” Chu Xianning’s eyelashes drooped slightly. “I also have many worries, but I never knew who to talk to.”
“Can’t you talk to me?”
“No.” Chu Xianning replied softly.
“But humans invented writing and language precisely to exchange their thoughts.”
“But some words… just can’t be spoken. The more you say them, the more confusing they become.” Chu Xianning’s voice grew softer and softer. Her eyes were still fixed on the distant silver waterfall. After a long while, she mumbled, “And some words aren’t useful even if you say them, and you can’t make them clear just by saying them.”
“For example?”
“For example, I used to tell you to be obedient, and you agreed to be obedient, but did you really become obedient?” Chu Xianning finally retracted her gaze, her cool eyes falling on Jiang Huai’s face.
Jiang Huai couldn’t quite explain himself at that moment. Chu Xianning was entirely correct. Chu Xianning had warned him many times before, but each time, he would forget the pain once he recovered.
“When you first started to be disobedient, I was so angry that I couldn’t sleep all night.”
“Which time?” Jiang Huai was startled.
“When you were fourteen, in the courtyard, we were drinking. You thought I was drunk and quietly pinched my face a few times while I was asleep. You even leaned closer to me, your breath falling on my face, but in the end, you didn’t dare to take another step forward.”
Jiang Huai was stunned. “So… Master wasn’t asleep then?”
“Every time I drank, I would stop when I had had enough. My body didn’t want to move, but my senses were very clear, so I remembered everything that happened every time I got drunk.” Chu Xianning turned her face away. “I was very angry that night and wanted to beat you up.”
“But I remember Master didn’t hit me that time…”
“Considering it was your first offense and you ultimately suppressed your greed, I thought you would regret it when you grew older and understood things better.” Chu Xianning’s tone even revealed a hint of grievance now. “But not only did you not repent, you even escalated it. First, you stopped calling me Mother and started calling me Master. Then, you subtly tested me by asking me to call you older sister… If your massages and foot baths before were due to your filial piety as a child, can you guarantee that at fourteen or fifteen, you truly had a pure heart and no evil thoughts?”
Jiang Huai naturally couldn’t answer. Even when he was a child… he was actually just infatuated with Chu Xianning’s beauty and always wanted to be close to her.
“Every time I hit you, I never used excessive force, just to make you remember the lesson. Do you think I didn’t know your cries of pain were fake? I always believed you would repent and understand that you shouldn’t covet your master, especially since she is the mother who raised you. But you always forget the pain once you’ve recovered, and even become more aggressive. Last night, you even said… it’s because I always say strange things when you are about to give up?”
“For so many years, I’ve been alone. I don’t know how to teach you, so I’ve thought for a very long time, and I can’t figure out what I did wrong to make you, who was so obedient as a child, turn out like this? Is it because I spoiled you too much?”
“It’s not Master’s fault, it’s not Master’s fault. I was bewitched, I… I was greedy for Master’s beauty, I was greedy, so then…”
“If it’s because of this face, if it were destroyed, would you no longer be troubled by lust?” Chu Xianning’s sword ring flew to her, the blade pointing at her cheek.
Jiang Huai trembled in fright and, in an instant, rushed forward and hugged Chu Xianning tightly. “Don’t…”
“Then what do you truly want from me?” Chu Xianning’s rosy lips moved, and she whispered softly. Two lines of clear tears suddenly slid from the corners of her eyes.
