Chapter 24: A New Goal
After lunch with Zhu, Lu Zhiyin and she strolled in the park before returning to school.
Despite the outing, Lu Zhiyin remained lost, unable to find a purpose in life. However, being with Zhu did bring her a sense of peace and happiness.
“Feeling a bit better after our walk, junior?”
Standing at the library entrance, Zhu asked softly while unlocking the door with her key.
“Mhm… a little,” Lu Zhiyin nodded.
She followed Zhu back into the library, aimlessly wandering among the bookshelves.
The vast array of books obscured her vision. Lu Zhiyin didn’t enjoy reading, but she needed to do something to distract herself from her confusion and pain.
So, Lu Zhiyin casually picked a romance novel from the shelf.
Today, Lu Zhiyin was particularly lazy; she didn’t want to read textbooks or study history that shouldn’t exist in this world.
Holding the novel she didn’t particularly like, Lu Zhiyin returned to a table.
She sat down and gently stroked the book’s cover.
Zhu sat across from her.
“Junior, do you like reading romance novels?”
Noticing the book’s cover, Zhu paused for a moment.
She couldn’t imagine this solitary child liking romance novels. Most people she knew who enjoyed such books were girls in their adolescence, full of dreams about love.
Zhu didn’t think the girl in front of her was someone who craved love.
“I wouldn’t say I like them,” Lu Zhiyin shook her head. There was no need to lie about such a minor detail.
“I don’t dislike them either. I just read whatever comes my way.”
Opening the book, Lu Zhiyin skipped the preface and synopsis.
Starting from the first chapter, Lu Zhiyin remained silent.
Bathed in the bright sunlight, the girl was unusually quiet. As time passed, Lu Zhiyin became completely engrossed in the novel. Her facial expressions gradually relaxed, and the false expressions on her face disappeared.
She showed anger when angered and smiled when happy – things that should be easy for anyone, but were so rare for Lu Zhiyin.
…
Time slowly trickled by, and in the blink of an eye, the sun began to set, its bright light fading.
The dim twilight was gentle, casting an orange-yellow glow on the pages in front of Lu Zhiyin.
Suddenly looking up, Lu Zhiyin realized it was getting late. She raised her head in surprise, turning her head to observe her surroundings.
The darkening sports ground outside the window confirmed she wasn’t mistaken.
“I’ve been here for so long without even realizing it…”
Astonished inwardly, she had almost finished the book in her hand.
Closing the book, Lu Zhiyin stood up.
In the distance, Zhu was sitting behind the counter, wearing headphones and operating the keyboard and mouse.
While Lu Zhiyin was engrossed in the book, Zhu had watched her for a while before cautiously returning to her computer to attend to her own tasks.
She enjoyed helping others, but that didn’t mean she should neglect her own work.
“I’m sorry, Senior Zhu. I got so absorbed in the book that I didn’t realize how much time had passed. I hope I didn’t disturb you?”
Perhaps because Zhu was so unassuming, Lu Zhiyin let down her guard and became completely immersed in a low-quality romance novel.
Lu Zhiyin awkwardly touched her head, not hiding the shy innocence that the girl possessed but was forced to suppress.
Zhu took off her headphones, and just as she looked up, Lu Zhiyin’s shy smile involuntarily intruded into her vision.
“…”
Her heart skipped a beat, and Zhu pursed her lips.
She had to admit that a girl smiling from the heart was truly adorable.
“It’s alright. The library is a public place, and everyone has the right to be here. This isn’t my territory, so there’s no need to apologize to me.”
Closing the game on her computer, Zhu shook her head.
“Mhm.”
Lu Zhiyin nodded heavily, feeling a sense of relief for some reason? Ah, she probably really considered Zhu a friend.
The only, sole friend who treated her as an equal.
Whether she was revered as a deity or degraded as a plaything, these were not what Lu Zhiyin desired.
She thought, this is good, it’s good like this now.
Interacting as equals.
Lu Zhiyin closed her eyes slightly.
She thought she needed to find a new goal to sustain herself, a new choice that transcended the idea of going home. Only then could she persevere and not drown in the spiderweb woven by Ouyang Qing.
Her gaze fixed on Zhu, Lu Zhiyin pondered carefully what she should do, what she ought to do.
Change this terrible world? No, no, Lu Zhiyin didn’t have that grand ambition. She was no longer a naive child and couldn’t utter such arrogant words.
Speaking of which, why did Lu Zhiyin want to go back? Was it simply because she missed her parents? Perhaps, but maybe it was more due to her fear of the current world?
At this point, Lu Zhiyin no longer knew what she truly wanted.
After a moment of bewilderment, an answer gradually formed in Lu Zhiyin’s heart, a goal to strive for next.
She decided to try living in this world, as a brand new girl named Lu Shiyu. Not as the female lead of a game, and certainly not as the self-loathing, insecure, cowardly monster who had transformed from male to female in her previous life.
She wanted to live a vibrant life, more vibrant than her past life, to be able to communicate with people as an equal, without having to flatter them or wear a fake mask.
To live for herself? That was probably it.
Since returning home was hopeless, she would make her life in this world better.
With this thought, a glimmer of light returned to Lu Zhiyin’s eyes.
Zhu saw the light in Lu Zhiyin’s eyes. She didn’t know what the girl had seen in the book, but she was certain that the girl before her was no longer lost.
Zhu didn’t realize that Lu Zhiyin’s lack of confusion was due to her few words.
“Junior Lu Shiyu, I’m glad to see you’ve perked up.”
Nodding, Zhu extended her hand.
She thought the junior before her was fortunate; her period of confusion was short, unlike those who wasted their lives by being lost for years, even decades.
Zhu was genuinely happy for Lu Zhiyin.
“Yes, thank you, Senior. Meeting you is my good fortune.”
Lu Zhiyin smiled and took Zhu’s hand.
The cold touch of her hand made Zhu unconsciously lower her head. The almost completely faded handwriting belonging to Zhu on the back of the girl’s hand also caught Zhu’s eye.
The black ink stained the fair skin, the intermingling of black and white, coupled with the girl’s somewhat ambiguous words, caused Zhu’s face to quickly turn red.
Her heart skipped a beat again, and a strange excitement rose in her chest.
Her thumb gently brushed over the writing on the back of the girl’s hand. Those short two words would soon disappear completely, as expected.
Thinking of this, Zhu felt a pang of emptiness.
“Well, Senior, it’s getting late. I should go. I still need to figure out how to deal with my friend and an annoying obsessed girl.”
Pulling her hand away, Lu Zhiyin bowed to Zhu.
“Ah… yes, I understand. Go ahead and take care of it. If you encounter any problems in the future, you can still come to me. You know, I’m happy to help.”
Watching Lu Zhiyin’s retreating back, Zhu inexplicably looked forward to their next meeting.
