Chapter: 10. Problem?
Because strong, so fragile.
Originating from being different, one tends to put on a strong front.
“So when you look at that child, if she suddenly says something like ‘I’m tired, I need to sleep’ or ‘I’m hungry, what are we having today,’ then she must be about to shed tears again. But she doesn’t want to affect others’ moods, so she can only change the topic herself and bear all the repression alone.”
“Is that really the case…?” Xiya’s fists were clenched weakly, but she felt grateful that every time Xue Fei said she was hungry, she would give her a few extra pieces of the cabbage mushrooms she loved. “I never… knew this. She only ever talks to me about Belis and you all; she seldom talks about herself… no, she has never mentioned her own feelings of distress.”
“Sigh… that child is just like that. She talks endlessly about others’ matters but speaks lightly of her own. After she failed to form a contract when she was little and locked herself in her room for those few days, the room was very dim. Although she always pretended not to care, even now, once she steps into a dim, closed space where it’s only her, she becomes anxious and unconsciously fears breaking into a cold sweat. This fragility is her real self; it’s the heartache that she’s carried from that time.”
“!”
At the moment Queen Herlith stood up from in front of the blue flower.
Hearing this, Xiya felt an unspeakable heartache and shock inside her.
She knew that Xue Fei was afraid of the dark—she always thought it was a trait inherited from her past life.
But what was the actual reason?
The real reason Xue Fei was afraid of the dark was all in Herlith’s narration.
Xiya subconsciously tightened her fists until her skin hurt, her teeth biting into her lower lip as if punishing herself.
My previous thoughts…
Were truly too arrogant.
I always thought that because I was the only one who knew about Xue Fei’s past life, I knew everything about her.
But even the reason why she is afraid of the dark now was just a subconscious wrong judgment, wasn’t it…
Xue Fei was no longer just the Xue Fei of her past life; my understanding of her might only be half, or even less than half.
The years spent together in the past amounted to twenty years.
The years apart from her also equaled twenty years.
It suddenly struck Xiya… Was she too dependent on Xue Fei’s tolerance?
She had always been joking, making light-hearted remarks, bringing laughter to every day.
And Xiya just thought she understood her, matching her laughter, teasing her about her antics from time to time.
Yet she had never asked—when it gets dark, does Xue Fei need me to hold her?
Looking at Xiya’s expression, Herlith’s gaze was complex, but more than that, it was a mix of relief.
“It seems you have also realized it, Miss Xiya, becoming an important person to Xue Fei is not an easy task.”
“I understand… I’m sorry for being too arbitrary… If given the chance, I hope to hear you share more stories about Xue Fei in the future. I… want to understand her better, help her, and… protect her.”
“……”
This time, it was Herlith who looked a bit surprised.
Protect her…?
Protection…
A soft laughter came, making Xiya feel a little flustered.
She was worried that her comments might be too childish, leading to a terrible impression on the queen!
But when Herlith actually spoke, it seemed to be different.
“Hahahaha… you say protect… interesting, very interesting. Knowing that Xue Fei is an Eight Wings with astounding powers beyond our comprehension, do you still have the confidence to say you can ‘protect’ her? You must have witnessed how exaggerated her magic can be, right?”
“Yes.” Xiya’s reply was defying logic but felt so natural and irrefutable. “Protection… as you said, I know I can’t reach Xue Fei’s strength. But her fragile side… I will find a way, try every way, so she won’t feel anxious… to the best of my abilities…”
Her cerulean eyes finally lifted.
Clear as the sky, deep as the ocean.
“Become her ‘strength,’ be the torch she needs to get through the dark night.”
Even when it’s ice cold.
Even in a starless dark night.
I will run there.
In the night she fears being alone, I will accompany her, hold her.
Waiting until the sun rises.
Waiting until… she no longer needs to force a joke but can laugh heartily and carefreely from the bottom of her heart.
That is enough.
A flicker of light danced in Herlith’s eyes before it vanished. Even the queen was taken aback for a while.
She initially thought Xiya would back down at this moment, but who knew she would forge ahead unyieldingly!
But the queen, after all, is a queen.
Surprise for her was merely to understand the steps of the person in front of her better.
“Pfft… to be honest, this truly surprised me, Miss Xiya. I actually find it quite strange. Why do you think Xue Fei relies on you so much? She has only mentioned her Eight Wings to me and Dizna. Belis seems to know now as well…? Xue Fei didn’t tell Belis before because she was worried Belis would worry for her. But you, Miss Xiya, are the exception.”
Herlith’s gaze suddenly sharpened.
It seemed curious, wanting to see through the mystery hidden in Xiya’s eyes.
“You’ve only known each other for such a short time, yet Xue Fei has confided so much to you. Since she shared her Eight Wings with you, it means she isn’t afraid to trouble you. In other words, she feels deep inside that you can embrace her existence. How can this child have such a side… it truly puzzles me.”
Puzzling, but also fills me with joy.
Herlith was indeed the queen of the Demon Territory.
But she was also the mother of Xue Fei.
As a mother, seeing her usually stoic daughter find someone she can rely on is indeed a great thing, isn’t it?
However… why did this reliance form so quickly, and why is her companion the hero of the kingdom? This left Herlith perplexed.
A bead of cold sweat trickled down Xiya’s forehead as she swallowed the nervous lump in her throat.
Oh no… how do I explain this?
Xiya had already decided to bury her past life in her heart forever.
This matter belonged solely to her and Xue Fei—it was a secret that Xiya had always taken pride in and cherished.
So, she would never speak of it in that direction.
But avoiding this truth! I couldn’t even figure out how to explain why Xue Fei, after being captured for only a few months, became lovers with me!
Xiya frequently glanced back, as if trying to find some hint from Xue Fei seated in the distance, and her panicked little eyes were caught by Herlith.
At first, Herlith approached step by step, seemingly unwilling to back down without finding an answer.
However.
There was one thing Xiya did not know.
Herlith was not someone who sought “definite answers” for everything.
She didn’t need to.
“[True Mirror Still Water].”
“Huh?”
“I mean, this is my inherent magic.”
Only then did Xiya realize that Herlith’s enchanting purple eyes seemed to flicker with a light similar to that when Xue Fei activated [Visual Magic], yet there was something slightly different.
At this moment, Herlith stood tall, her hands clasped in front of her as she tilted her head and smiled, closing her eyes, causing the magical particles in front of her to dissipate.
“Xue Fei’s inherent magic is the only one in the world, [Visual Magic], which can see through lies and discern illusions. I always thought this peculiar ability of hers was inherited from me~ Um… but it’s somewhat different. My inherent magic is not visual but able to see through all good and evil, [True Mirror Still Water].”
“See through… good and evil?”
“Yes, kindness and malice are clear as day to me. So among the officials big and small in our Demon Territory, there isn’t a single rotten apple? Pfft… because those with ill intentions are eliminated before causing trouble; malice can’t escape the bright mirror~”
“……”
No wonder she is the mother of Xue Fei and Belis…
That smile of hers had an aura that rivaled that of Princess Belis!
After saying this, Xiya suddenly realized she should have continued thinking of a suitable excuse for what just happened!
But.
Herlith waved her left hand, interrupting Xiya’s already meaningless contemplation.
“Never mind, Miss Xiya, since you don’t wish to speak, then let it be. Because this answer is no longer important. I can see that you have no ill intentions regarding this matter. When you think of Xue Fei, I see your soul as pure and clean as a boundless snow-covered mountain, absolutely ‘good.’ Ha… to be honest, I’ve never seen such pure goodwill before, no… I should say it’s love, to be precise?”
“!”
Xiya’s sense of shame suddenly ignited.
Her hands were clenched over her chest, and her head was shaking back and forth like a rattle drum!
But…
After shaking for a little while, her face turned scarlet, and she went from shaking her head to slowly nodding.
Madly shaking her head explained nothing in denial.
While lightly shaking her head was the firmest affirmation.
Seeing her like this, Herlith finally smiled more naturally.
She too was in a good mood.
“Mm-mm! Just as I thought… love knows no gender; it’s free and unrestrained! Ahhh… if you ask me, I believe in love at first sight. Perhaps you just don’t remember it. Maybe you two have shared life and death in your past lives; it was destined that you are meant to be a pair of playful lovebirds!”
“!”
Oh dear, what an understanding child.
Herlith sighed with a wry smile, feeling that many things were indescribably complicated.
There are countless mysteries in the world that cannot be touched. Since good and evil have been discerned, why bother entangling over the trivial and complex reasons behind it?
With a flick of her ankle-length cerulean gown, she brushed aside numerous flowers and grasses.
Herlith faced Xiya directly, her expression suddenly becoming a bit serious.
“By the way, we’ve chatted so much. Miss Xiya, I wonder if you can answer me a question?”
“I’m open to any questions! No… as long as it’s not about state secrets, I can answer anything else.”
“Hahahaha, I wouldn’t ask such boring things! Now pay attention to my question.”
Xiya straightened her expression, her attitude extremely serious.
She had a premonition that whether Queen Herlith would accept her relationship with Xue Fei hinged on how she would answer this question, whether she would be satisfied!
Go on, my wisdom.
Do your best, my emotional intelligence!
The gentle breeze blew through the flowers and grasses, and as the wind gradually stilled, everything became calm in that moment.
Herlith, still maintaining a smile, slowly asked,
“You say you and Xue Fei are in a relationship beyond friendship, right?”
“Yes… yes.”
“Then, have you and Xue Fei… done it?”
“Pfft!”
