Chapter 19 My Younger Sister Became Unhappy
The time is 4:30 AM.
The location is my room.
I stared at my biological sister, An Xinran, with the most serious expression on my face.
I had already put on a T-shirt, and at my strong insistence, Xinran had also put on her nightgown.
She sat on my bed, hugging a pillow, displaying a rare, flustered expression, while I sat on a chair with a blank face.
Just moments ago, my dear sister had created one of the biggest embarrassing moments of my life.
“I didn’t expect a man’s erection could still produce urine.”
How dare you say that! If I weren’t so calm and thick-skinned, there’s no way I could be facing you like this! Someone else might even feel like committing suicide!
Hiss… Hoo…
Calm down, stay composed. I can’t yell.
Making a fuss without thinking is pointless. As long as we talk things through properly, I can understand Xinran’s inner thoughts.
I changed my usual passive attitude and began this conversation with a slightly stronger tone, in a lecturing manner.
“Sit up straight. Do you know what you did?”
“…I know.”
Of course, she knew what she was doing. Rather, it was precisely because she knew that she did such a thing.
My younger sister is an older brother complex (Bro-con).
And a particularly severe one at that.
That title radiating with pink light is the most direct evidence.
Accepting her is impossible, morally, ethically, and legally. Unlike Keling, who later became my sister, Xinran is my biological sister; we are related by blood.
Therefore, there’s no need to be melancholy. It would have been better to decisively tell her it’s impossible… but now it’s too late.
If I had nipped her special feelings for me in the bud when they first emerged, there wouldn’t be so many problems, right? But the dull me never noticed… I even thought Xinran hated me until yesterday.
The result is this situation: my biological sister, while I was asleep, did all sorts of inappropriate things.
And now, if I were to suddenly say, ‘It’s impossible between biological siblings, and we have no future together,’ Xinran would probably, no, definitely go berserk.
For the sake of my sister’s mental health and my own safety, outright refusal is not an option.
I must avoid the dangerous path; I don’t want to face a BAD ENDING in my life.
Communication can resolve most problems. Sweet talk is for charming girls, gentle words are for comforting others, grand pronouncements can muster courage, and self-talk can clarify thoughts!
What’s needed now is directness!
“When did it start?”
“Five years ago…”
Pfft!
Five years!
That’s too long a span of time!
Meaning, during these nearly 1,800 days, I’ve been unknowingly asleep like a dead person every night?
“Do you come here every day?”
Xinran lowered her head and remained silent.
What should I do?
Do I have to resort to that move…?
“Hoo… I understand. You had a nightmare, didn’t you?”
I lied. I knew very well that Xinran wasn’t coming to me because of a nightmare, yet I fabricated a reason. Although lying makes me feel guilty and uncomfortable, it’s unavoidable at this moment.
“I remember when we used to share a room, you had a nightmare once and crawled into my bed.”
This is also a lie. It never happened, but since it was so long ago, I’ll just make up some memories.
It’s very flimsy. Perhaps she has already seen through my lie.
But as long as I compromise here, we will both have a temporary retreat, and things will be somewhat better for both of us.
Xinran silently nodded. Her cold expression softened considerably, perhaps she felt a little more at ease.
For now, let’s leave it at that. I can’t push her any further.
I sighed, stood up from the chair, and was about to tell her, ‘Go back to sleep,’ when she spoke first.
“Brother, were you… awake from the beginning?”
“No, I woke up not long ago.”
“You didn’t sleep last night either, did you?”
“You know?”
How did she know?
“You poured the coffee into the trash can.”
So she found out… Tsk, I should have flushed it down the toilet.
“So, from the coffee in the trash can, you inferred that I didn’t sleep last night and might have already known about you… Even so, you still came today.”
“Yes, I was mentally prepared yesterday…”
So that’s why Xinran wasn’t panicked at all just now and acted so calmly. It was because she was already mentally prepared.
“I can finally tell you, Brother… I like you… not the love of family, I truly like you, Brother.”
Her expression was extremely serious. I could feel that Xinran wasn’t lying.
Unlike Ji Lianbing’s playful words, this was a confession filled with determination.
Being mentally prepared didn’t mean being prepared for me to find out, but being prepared to confess to me?
Honestly, I was moved.
However, being moved is one thing, and accepting it is another. The moral principles in my heart do not allow me to accept this confession.
“Xinran, I…”
“You don’t need to answer. I didn’t expect an answer from you. It’s just, for now, can you allow me to stay by your side? I promise I won’t interfere with your life…”
Shock.
It turns out everything was my overthinking. I didn’t need to guide her at all; she had already figured it out from the beginning. She must have been more lost than I was, thought more than I did, and been more confused than I am, struggling with contradictions since five years ago…
Facing such a younger sister, how could I refuse her final plea?
“I understand… However, we must establish boundaries.”
“Okay.”
So, am I finally going to ask the question that I have to face…
I closed my eyes and pondered for a few seconds before asking her the question that concerned me the most.
“Alright, honestly, how far did you go while I was asleep?”
“…Just sleeping and hugging.”
“Tell me the truth, what did you do? Otherwise, I’ll tell Mom…”
The corners of her mouth turned down slightly. Xinran seemed a bit displeased, or rather, unhappy?
If it were my usual self, I would have caved immediately.
Fearing that my sister would hate me even more, I would have backed down… But! Today, I have the upper hand! I must get a clear answer, otherwise, this life will be unbearable!
“There really wasn’t anything… Originally, I wanted to make you drink that coffee that day, and then do something after you fell asleep… but you discovered me…”
Although she put on a displeased look, she still recounted her actions one by one, and I broke out in a cold sweat.
How dangerous!
It scared me into a cold sweat!
I was almost beyond saving!
I was practically standing at the doorstep of German orthopedics… No, wait, Dad is an orthopedic surgeon. If he broke my leg, I wouldn’t need to go to Germany; he could treat me himself… Then break it again? And again? Would this cycle leave me bedridden for life?
Terrifying!
Xinran fidgeted with her fingers, observing my expression, and asked timidly like a child who had done something wrong: “…Can I sleep with you in the future too?”
If I say no, she might cry… If it’s just sleeping together, it should be fine, but we need to make some ground rules beforehand.
“Yes, but wear your pajamas.”
“Then hugging?”
“Hugging with arms is okay.”
“Then kissing?”
“Forehead and cheeks are okay.”
“Ugh… In the West, relatives kiss each other too; it’s just a form of etiquette.”
“No, I’m not Western, and neither are you. And a kiss mixed with personal feelings is no longer etiquette.”
“I promise it will be pure.”
“Still no.”
“Hmph…”
Xinran snorted coldly, putting on her usual ice-cold expression again, and turned her face away.
The corner of her mouth drooped a few tenths of a degree more.
She became even more unhappy.
