Chapter 0: Before the Story Begins
It might be unusual for me to start things off, wouldn’t you agree?
After all, this has always been his story, narrated from his perspective.
While others might provide supplementary details (and I’ve been a supplementary narrator before), overall, it has remained ‘Juncheng An’s story. Arranging for me to take the lead like this is truly wicked of Liu. If one story is just reaching its climax, naturally, we’d shift to another.
Be careful not to die from overworking yourselves.
So, before I begin telling this story, I need to say something else. No matter who disappears or dies, the world will continue to function. The world doesn’t change because of one person’s absence or demise.
This is wrong. Especially for someone important. They are like a single gear in precision equipment; without it, the entire machine grinds to a halt.
One person’s death affects many around them, and a pivotal figure…
He was like that. Everyone revolved around him, and the story unfolded around him.
Juncheng An was the ‘protagonist,’ the one standing at the center. He always felt like a protagonist, believing he was just an ordinary passerby.
This is a natural feeling, even though he himself never felt that way. He has truly become the backbone of everyone. Gentle and upright, sacrificing himself—although he could be a bit dense or emotionally slow at times, he was aware of these shortcomings. He always did his best, doing everything he could to achieve a good ending (Good Ending).
And he truly did. He saved everyone except himself.
A world without him would be no different from destruction. At least, for the girls who deeply loved him, the world was equivalent to destruction.
Oh dear, after all, those sentimental girls are always so emotional. Although my name carries the word ‘Ai,’ I am not that kind of empathetic person. When I heard the news, I didn’t shed a single tear.
I tend to view things logically, calmly searching for solutions. Therefore, this is not a story about acting to save Juncheng An. I am acting for ‘me,’ for ‘myself.’ Please imagine the specifics.
I am Zi’ai An, Juncheng An’s ‘other half.’ What kind of other half, you ask? Unlike him, who never lied, I am a woman. Many men, when they don’t understand women, tend to believe that women are ‘unreasonable,’ a kind of ‘unpredictable alien being.’ Some might say ‘a woman is always right,’ but most men, when they don’t understand, choose to compromise and let things be. Over time, women, including myself, have developed further problems.
Yes, Juncheng An was like that too. Because he could ‘accept’ everything, other women became so infatuated with him. He indulged the women around him too much, accepting them all completely, regardless of their flaws or past sins. Oh, what a good man. It doesn’t matter what you look like, no matter what sins you’ve committed, I accept you? Honestly, I was tempted too. He was a natural ‘woman killer,’ a ‘beauty magnet.’ His personality seemed ordinary, but he possessed an extraordinary ability to accept the abnormal.
While he had the Yata no Kagami’s power, it was his own ability to accept the abnormal world that truly stood out. He could completely adapt to it, treating it as ‘part of his daily life.’ Ordinary people would rarely accept such things.
Only a few people noticed his unique trait and began to pursue him. But he, believing himself to be ordinary, feared it. He didn’t want trouble, and he was unwilling to get involved in matters that didn’t concern him.
You might say, ‘Aren’t you the same as him?’ No, no, no. I am different. I am ‘Zi’ai An,’ not ‘Juncheng An.’
Juncheng An can only be himself; no one else can replace him. When he refused to accept their ‘belonging,’ these willful women went mad. They completely lost their minds, disregarding all consequences, becoming hysterical. However, one person, despite being on the brink of madness, managed to suppress her uncontrollable emotions and maintain her clarity. That was Lanhua.
Although she eventually got the love she deserved, it wasn’t because Juncheng An accepted her, but because she fought for it herself. It seems Juncheng An’s reason for refusing her was simple: Juncheng An could accept her, but he couldn’t be ‘monopolized’ by her. If he wanted to accept everyone’s love, he couldn’t respond to just one person. Ah, what a playboy, a mobile woman-izer. The word ‘scum’ fits him perfectly. Well, this was ‘correct,’ the ‘only’ choice. If he had chosen just one of them, things would have become even worse.
See, isn’t there an idiom for this? ‘Misfortunes never come singly.’ Since he had already ‘attracted trouble,’ how could he only face bad luck once? The countless arrows pointed at him had pierced him, and he accepted them all. So, everyone forgave him, comforting him instead, telling him not to feel guilty. He had to compromise because he was rejected once, thus ceding the chance to create a harem.
But Lanhua couldn’t accept this outcome. She was only rejected once, so she ‘had to’ let her chance slip away. Giving up the opportunity to be with Juncheng An was letting someone else take it. But if she had a chance to choose again, she would definitely not share her beloved.
Is this normal? Who would share the person they love? It’s impossible. Love and possessiveness are inseparable because humans are inherently selfish. Wanting love means wanting to possess it. You probably don’t understand what I’m saying.
Ah, I’ve been rambling on about nonsense. You might all be confused. After all, my words are a bit abstract… Besides, ‘Lanhua’ and the ‘current’ story don’t have much to do with each other. She was merely a witness. Then why am I going to such lengths to talk about her selfish and possessive nature? She… that’s all.
Frankly, when I recall this story, I always think of ‘myself.’ And then I remember her words to me.
“Zi’ai, when do you think something ‘belongs’ to you?”
Right from this eyebrow-raising question. “How could it belong to someone? Unless it’s a slave or something.”
“That’s too broad… What about possessions? The simplest answer is things you buy. When you’re browsing in a store, you don’t have the feeling that ‘this is mine.’ Only after paying do you feel ‘this is mine.’”
“So, it’s about ‘paying a price’? You feel something is yours when you pay for it.”
“You say that, and it sounds strange… but it’s true. Then do you think this thing still belongs to you?”
“What if it gets stolen or snatched away? Do you still feel it belongs to you?”
“…That’s ambiguous, it depends on the situation. If it’s an unimportant item, you won’t care if it’s lost. But if it’s very important, you’ll want it back… That’s the boundary of judgment, of belonging.”
“So, it’s about ‘the degree of importance’?”
“Yes. That’s what ‘belonging’ means.”
“In summary, it’s ‘an important item acquired by paying a price.’”
“I feel that might be too biased… Why are you suddenly asking so many questions?”
“I want to tidy my room recently, but there are too many things I can’t bear to throw away.”
“Huh? What kind of things? Buttons? Used toothbrushes…?”
“Of course, they’re Juncheng’s things. A strand of his hair, his personal shirt…”
“You’re a stalker, literally. Speaking of which, why are you collecting so many of his things? He can’t be yours alone, nor can he only respond to you.”
“To vent my desires and keep a memento. Seeing these things naturally reminds me of Juncheng, as if he’s always by my side. It gives me the feeling that I’ve ‘obtained’ him.”
“Tsk, I find that very normal. Only then can I feel like he’s still with me.”
“Is that so? That’s why I cherish the time I spend with him. I always…”
“Sucking?”
“Just my finger. Hoo hoo, what did you think of?”
“Pffft—are you an infant? Still sucking your finger to sleep?”
“Infants suck their fingers out of psychological hunger. Oh, and that young miss too.”
“Unsatisfied desires… You’re the one doing the most, aren’t you? It feels like ‘he doesn’t belong to me.’”
“Who knows? Hoo… It’s just that I always have this feeling that ‘others and myself are fundamentally different.’ Wanting to possess someone is inherently different from love. If you continue like this, you’ll lose him sooner or later.”
“…So, I need to throw some things away. Hoo hoo.”
In the end, she seemed to only want to tell me ‘I just want to tidy my room.’ It’s just that I saw her possessiveness mixed with love. It’s probably possessiveness. Juncheng must have noticed Lanhua’s madness early on.
But this has nothing to do with me. My mission this time is just to narrate this story.
So, the prologue ends here. It’s almost time to get to the main story.
Oh, right. One last reminder for everyone.
I am a selfish woman who speaks in lies.
So, please, don’t be deceived by me.
What I’ve said above might also be lies, hehe…
