Chapter 55: Wanting to Be Cared For
Consumed by a rational monster…
If it were me before, perhaps that’s what I would have said. But I think the current me has changed somewhat.
Unlike before, when I had no desires and felt indifferent towards everything, now I have things I want, things I want to reclaim, and things I want to possess.
“Are you saying you’re not like that? Heh, but you’re still thinking right now, which means your reason still occupies the high ground of your consciousness.”
“Isn’t that obvious? If I couldn’t even think, wouldn’t I be completely led by my emotions?”
“That’s why I say you’re the same as me.”
But isn’t that too extreme?
“Isn’t it? Even on the verge of losing emotional control, you’d prioritize calming yourself down rather than letting your emotions run wild, wouldn’t you?”
…
I have severed my inner feelings and achieved emotional detachment. That’s why I can understand what Lianbing is saying.
In fact, I’ve already experienced similar things, and not just once.
Whether it was when I was possessed by the nightmare in a spiral of nightmares created by Nuo, or when I was searching for Hei’er inside Shub-Niggurath’s body, or when I was confined in the blissful pure land of the mirror world by Ruansui, I might have been lost, but I never completely fell into it.
Because I discarded it.
I discarded my heart, discarded my emotions, and finally regained myself.
It turns out… upon reflection, it really is as Lianbing said.
What was supporting me back then?
I can’t recall it clearly, nor can I express it in words, but I just didn’t want to give up. No wonder Lianbing said we were both consumed by rational monsters.
“I think it’s a good thing, because nothing can easily shake us.”
“But wouldn’t that be too cold-blooded?”
“If this is cold-blooded, then I admit I am a cold-blooded animal, hahaha…”
Lianbing chuckled again, but this time her eyes weren’t smiling. Her gaze was as cold as a snake’s, flicking its tongue and staring at its prey.
I no longer felt fear. Even if I knew she was a beautiful snake with potent venom, I would probably embrace her. Even if the end result was the fable of the farmer and the snake, I wouldn’t regret it.
The venomous beautiful snake, I would probably embrace her…
If something like that happens… ah, this is like setting a flag for myself.
“And if I hadn’t done so, I wouldn’t be sitting next to you like this right now. Just the mere thought of displeasing you would keep me within three meters of you. Sitting next to you like this feels like I’m next to a greasy toad.”
She suddenly switched to her venomous tongue mode. But if Lianbing is a venomous snake, then feeling like a toad doesn’t seem too bad, does it?
“It’s that serious? Then thank you for enduring the disgusting feeling and sitting beside me.”
Lianbing said this to me, bowing her head as she apologized.
“I am extremely sorry. It was I who spoke out of turn. If you are angry, please punish me as you see fit.”
—This is too exaggerated. Is it really necessary?
“Alright, I’m not angry. Get up quickly.”
“No, I promised you before that I would never insult you with words again. If you don’t give me some substantial punishment, I cannot accept it.”
I haven’t insulted you. But just now, I said such things again. If…
I also need further punishment. Please… My mind conjured some R-rated images, but of course, I couldn’t and wouldn’t do such a crazy thing. Just then, Xinran returned and said to us.
“Juncheng, the bathwater is ready.”
“Oh, thanks. I’ll be right there.”
“Then I’ll punish you by making you kneel here until I finish my bath,” I said somewhat bothered.
“Then I’ll finish my bath quickly. Kneeling for too long will make my legs numb.”
Following Xinran back to the second-floor bathroom, I suddenly realized I’d gone through the process of undressing and dressing multiple times today.
But for once, I could undress myself properly…
Just as I thought this, Xinran opened the bathroom door and peeked in.
“Oh, right. Let me help you undress.”
“There’s no need for that,” I replied weakly, having anticipated this.
“But didn’t Lianjie help you undress before? Won’t you be unaccustomed to having no one help you? So it should be…”
“I’m even more unaccustomed to you helping me! Lianbing, it’s because she said, ‘Helping the Master change is a maid’s duty,’ and insisted on changing my clothes. I couldn’t refuse her.”
This time, she conceded obediently. Was it because my tone was a bit stronger?
In any case, I finally have some personal space. A bath to relieve fatigue would be good, at least I can relax properly. But I need to watch the time; Lianbing is still kneeling in the living room.
However, since she’s kneeling on the sofa, it shouldn’t be uncomfortable… Anyway, I shouldn’t waste time. I’ll just take a ten-minute bath and get out.
I quickly undressed, rinsed myself, and tested the water temperature with my hand. After confirming it was okay, I was about to step into the bathtub when a situation suddenly flashed through my mind.
Just in case, I wrapped a towel around my waist, preventing anyone from suddenly barging in…
*Swoosh!*
The bathroom door was pulled open, and Xinran, wearing a swimsuit, walked in.
“I’ll scrub your back for you.”
I KNEW IT!
“Don’t worry, I’ve already changed into my swimsuit. This is a garment that won’t become transparent even if it gets wet.”
That’s not the issue!
When did she put on a swimsuit? Was it while the bathwater was being prepared?
It’s a white one-piece swimsuit. It looks a bit tight. This kind of swimsuit really doesn’t become transparent when wet?
Regardless, she can’t stay here!
“No! No need! Really! I can wash myself! So I really don’t need any help!”
“But you can’t reach your back, can you? And we don’t have a back scrubber at home.”
“Uh, well, anyway, I’ll find a way to wash myself! Don’t worry!”
“I’ll do it.”
… Can’t I just enjoy some alone time…? I want to be quiet.
Xinran, whose desire to be relied upon has been amplified, is even more troublesome than the Xinran from my original world. Her excessive thoughtfulness is annoying to the point of being troublesome.
At this moment, I regret it. I should have asked Lianbing to keep an eye on Xinran. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to take a bath at all.
“Stop it! Sister Xinran! Can’t you see he’s troubled!”
Huh–
Just then, another person barged into the bathroom.
And that person was…
“Keling? Why are you here? Have you been here all along?”
Keling isn’t asleep yet either…
Also, why is Keling… You two sisters planned this…?
I’m speechless.
“Mmph.”
Keling choked a little when Xinran asked, her cheeks turning slightly red.
However, she continued resolutely.
“He’s back so late!”
“I’m not hindering him. I just think he needs help.”
“He’s not a child anymore. He can’t even undress himself! Clearly, Sister Xinran, you’re overthinking it!”
“That’s why I didn’t insist on helping him undress. But he can’t reach his own back. He definitely needs my help.”
“Sister Xinran, you’ve done enough. So this time, leave it to me.”
“No, I’ll do it.”
“…Can you two please leave…”
I reminded them again in an extremely helpless tone, but they both ignored me and continued to argue, even to the point of acting physically.
No, I don’t mean they started fighting each other, but they started touching me.
“I told you! He’s troubled by it!”
“I’m just offering help. Juncheng, you don’t need to be polite with me. You can ask me for more favors.”
“So, Sister Xinran, don’t you realize you’re being annoying!”
Of course, I couldn’t say… I could only remain silent.
“See! He’s tacitly agreeing!”
“He didn’t say so.”
“Really… Every time! Sister Xinran! Every time! You think you’re caring for others, but you’re just satisfying yourself!”
“Why isn’t it okay!”
They suddenly started arguing. I… I… Ugh… I can go in to take a bath now…
At least wait until I finish before you argue.
“Let go of him quickly!”
“Ah, my hand slipped.”
Suddenly pushed, my lower body hit the edge of the bathtub, and I fell into the bathtub headfirst.
It hurt, it was hot, and it stung my eyes. Then I finally couldn’t stand it and exploded.
OOOOOHHHHHH!
Enough is enough!
What the hell is going on!
“[All of you, get out! Go back to your rooms!]”
Under my command, the two of them obediently went out. Xinran didn’t show much expression, but Keling said with a crying voice.
“I… I…”
Before she could finish, she had already walked out of the bathroom.
SF Light Novel
“What is all this…”
What’s wrong with these two?
I’ve lost all desire to bathe. I dried myself, got dressed, and returned to the living room.
“Haaa… Lianbing, give me a lap pillow. I’m emotionally exhausted.”
Lying on Lianbing’s soft lap, she suddenly looked towards the stairs and said.
“Heh, over there is the feeling of ‘wanting to be cared for’.”
“What? Are you talking about Keling?”
Lianbing smiled without answering, her meaning was obvious.
Wanting to be cared for? Is Keling’s amplified emotion this?
“One wants to be relied upon, and the other wants to be… cared for… Ah, these two sisters are really interesting.”
“But this is a bit too much. It makes me feel very uncomfortable.”
“If you can’t handle this, then you’ll have trouble in the future, my Master.”
Huh?
What do you mean? Will it get worse?
“I told you, amplifying emotions doesn’t stop. This is just the beginning of the infection. It will only get worse, so my Master should be psychologically prepared. Heh heh, by then… it won’t be just a minor scuffle like it is now.”
At this moment, I suddenly thought of Lan.
I vividly remember that at the very beginning, Lan’s…
My dependency wasn’t so severe, and her title was just [Stalker (Novice)]. But later, due to various events, that title kept changing, from novice to intermediate, then to advanced, and finally evolved into…
At that time, no one could stop Lan. She would only follow her desires and emotions.
In other words, Xinran and Keling will also evolve like Lan, their emotions becoming uncontrollable, and eventually even becoming ‘yandere’?
I trembled.
Originally, I thought Yang Shifan’s ability wasn’t that powerful. It was just used to instigate conflict between Masters and their connected witches who already had friction. It didn’t have much effect on me and those around me.
I didn’t pay much attention to it, basically.
But now I suddenly realized that things are not that simple.
Perhaps Yang Shifan’s ability is the true super ability that can dismantle an opponent from within without any effort!
If everyone truly became yandere, a massive fight would break out… The consequences would be unimaginable!
I’d be completely finished!
