Part 2: Where Did All the Disappeared Affection Go – Part 4
What should I say in this situation?
For a situation that feels like being caught in the act, experienced scum men would undoubtedly be able to blurt out an explanation instantly, turning public opinion to their favor, as if they were the ones being taken advantage of, and desperately begin to explain.
But at such a critical moment, I couldn’t even utter a single word.
Is it because my level as scum isn’t high enough? Or perhaps, I just can’t overcome the hurdles of my thick skin and conscience…
In any case, the best opportunity for an explanation was missed.
There was no room left for further explanation.
Yuhui cast a cold glance at me, then shifted her gaze to the connected part between me and Ling, before finally returning her gaze to my face and softly saying.
“Excuse me.”
*Clack*
The door was closed again.
I felt like I had stepped off a cliff and fallen into an abyss, my mood plummeting.
Ling sighed.
I mechanically turned my head to look at Ling. The blush on her face had faded, and her agitated emotions had calmed down, returning her from her flustered state to her usual self. Her gaze also became quite subtle, the kind of look that perfectly matched lines like “You’re so useless” or “You pathetic man.”
However, Ling didn’t say anything so hurtful. Instead, she took the initiative to embrace me, her long stockinged legs wrapping around my waist, turning a passive situation into an active one.
I immediately understood that Ling was comforting me, encouraging me to regain my confidence.
She’s truly become a good woman…
“…Aren’t you going after her?”
“Is this the time to be chasing after her?”
“–That’s right, as someone who plays with a different woman every day, a super… you should be chasing after her immediately. The first thing you should do is, well, try to keep her…”
“Can I still catch up if I go now?”
“Who knows, it depends on how much affection she has for you…”
How much affection Yuhui has for me.
If affection had ranking levels, then Yuhui’s affection for me would undoubtedly be off the charts.
That’s why Yuhui is so obedient, she does whatever I say, absolutely follows my orders, and is the loyal dog type who will never betray me.
When we first met, I thought Yuhui’s unconditional obedience was a bit excessive.
But now I understand her persistence; it’s the obsession left behind through countless cycles of samsara, the same as mine.
No matter how many times we’ve gone through it, no matter how many times our bodies and appearances have changed, that information engraved in our souls will always exist.
But the premise is…
She still remembers the ‘previous life’…
“It seems you have no ‘motivation’ right now… Forget it, let’s end it like this this time.”
Ling’s voice and actions pulled me out of my own world.
She took out medical tissues and began to clean up, tidying her clothes.
I also zipped up my pants, showing an apologetic, wry smile and said.
“I’m sorry…”
“It’s nothing; I’m always available. It’s not like this is the only chance… Or rather, do you think she’s forgotten you?”
“Yes, Yuhui isn’t a F, so her memories aren’t preserved… Even so, I still held onto hope in my heart.
Because Yuhui is special.
She’s someone who has experienced samsara like me, someone who has stayed by my side through all the reincarnations without abandoning me. So, in the First Playthrough of this new world with its infinite loop, she should remember too.
That’s what I thought.
Essentially, this is no different from samsara.
“Oh, so you didn’t chase after her because you discovered something different from your expectations.”
I was silent for a moment, then nodded in admission.
Yes, just now, Yuhui and I made eye contact, and from her gaze, I read her inner thoughts.
“Her gaze just now was filled with unfamiliarity and… possibly complete lack of recognition.”
It was the kind of look that a naturally reserved girl would have when seeing an adult engaged in coitus, a look filled with disgust.
Perhaps it was because she looked at me that way that I couldn’t say a word.
I’ve lived so long, yet I’m still so useless…
Is that so? She doesn’t remember anymore…
“What are you going to do now?”
“Hmm? Yuhui doesn’t remember…”
“That has nothing to do with whether she remembers or not. I’m asking you, what do *you* want to do?”
Looking at Ling’s earnest, clear, and transparent eyes, I fell into thought once again.
I understood why she asked. It indeed had nothing to do with whether Yuhui remembered; the key was what I wanted to do next.
Did I want to, once again, possess Yuhui?
I asked myself, my selfish self, that selfish desire.
The answer I received…
I really want to.
I want to very much.
I want to hold her in my arms again, to hear her call me ‘Lord Juncheng’ one more time, to see her shy and happy expression when I doted on her, to see her reluctantly strike various poses at my command, to admire her face as she served me with all her might, to stroke her cheek, and then to love her properly.
Ah, I’m so pathetic.
Am I not starting to ‘bluescreen’ too…
But this is my true feeling right now. It doesn’t matter if Yuhui remembers me or not; I just want to possess her again.
If it were the old me, I might have just let go, letting Yuhui live her life freely.
I might have thought that letting go would be the best outcome for both of us.
Perhaps, letting go and having no further connection truly is the best outcome.
But I don’t want the best outcome anymore; I want her herself.
After realizing this, I suddenly felt enlightened.
“As expected of you, Ling. One sentence was enough to untangle my knot.”
Remembering that I was the one who helped you untangle your knot in the first place… I’m truly regressing as I get older.
“I just hate seeing you so pathetic, and it bothers me too.”
“Bothers you, huh? How about we continue?”
“I’m not in the mood for that anymore. We’ll talk about it later. You still have seven or eight months until graduation; we can always play teacher-student if you want.”
“That’s true.”
“Alright, you should head back to class. You’ve skipped a lesson. Not only Yuhui Bai, but many other women are waiting for you to grace them.”
There are also Lianbing, Lan, and Li Nai at the school.
And their states are a bit strange too. After class ended, they didn’t come to find me proactively. They showed no sign of a “moving reunion” upon seeing me; they were too indifferent, almost cold, which was a bit disappointing.
As my F, it’s impossible they would forget me.
Then… I can’t figure it out.
Where did all the disappeared affection go?
Oh, that’s right, there’s one more thing I need to ask Ling.
Remembering this crucial matter, I asked Ling before leaving.
“By the way, Ling, Xueqing and Xuan’er aren’t at school, and Xiao An is also missing. Where are they now?”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know?”
Hey, wait, you’re the world, how can you not know?
“Why wouldn’t you know? Don’t you control the causality of fate?”
Ling got down from the infirmary desk, sat back in her chair, crossed her long legs, and said, crossing her arms.
“There’s nothing strange about it. Do you know everything that’s happened inside your own body? Probably not, right? It’s the same for me; it’s difficult for me to track these minute details of causality.”
Then how will I find them?
Do I have to search all over the world?
“Although I don’t know, there is one person who does.”
“Who? Ah…”
As I reflexively asked, I realized who Ling was referring to.
Ling nodded and said.
“Yes, she has an absolute ‘performance’ advantage over me. She can completely grasp the whole of ‘fate.’ If it weren’t for maintaining my style, she alone would be more than enough to control fate. The fact that I could replicate this world without any errors is also thanks to her; otherwise, it wouldn’t have gone so smoothly.”
This is the first time she’s told me something like this, and I couldn’t help but admire her. Is Lou Yi really that amazing?
Lou Ling and Lou Yi were originally just fragments of the world, but by using these fragments as seeds, they successfully replicated a new world that was indistinguishable from the original. This is an incredibly remarkable feat.
According to the butterfly effect,
Even a tiny change can influence the development of things, let alone an event as large-scale as reconstructing a world.
0yQE4’s Little Notes;
But in the end, we reached here—one can imagine how much Lou Yi has grown in this process.
“So, Lou Yi is that amazing? Does that mean if I want to know Xueqing’s whereabouts, I have to ask her?”
“Yes, but whether she’s willing to tell you is another matter.”
She has no reason not to tell me, right? It’s like asking the librarian to check which book is on which shelf; it’s not that difficult for her to retrieve the information, probably.
Then I’ll find Xueqing and the others on my day off.
I’ve asked everything I needed to. My beautiful nurse teacher has told me all she could, so it’s about time for me to leave.
“Then I’ll head back to the classroom first.”
I turned to leave the infirmary, but Ling pulled me back.
“Wait a moment.”
“Is there something else?”
Ling didn’t speak. She just tilted her head slightly, closed her eyes, and waited.
This… does she want a kiss?
Ah, it must be because our ellipsis was interrupted halfway by Yuhui barging in, so she’s unhappy.
She wants a kiss now as a form of comfort.
Her tilted head and slightly pouting lips are also very cute. I really want to take a picture.
Naturally, I responded happily.
I scooped up her soft body, had her sit on my lap, and gently kissed her.
Ling’s body relaxed, and she began to enjoy it.
A few minutes passed, and it still wasn’t over. Ling and I were getting a bit lost in it.
But at this moment…
*Clack*
The door opened again.
And it was Yuhui again.
Caught in the act again.
However, this time, the positions were completely reversed.
